Before my life fell apart and I became reclusive I was working as a personal trainer and keeping myself extremely fit.
Now, I don’t think many people would have the momentum and motivation to keep that fitness level when they don’t leave the house alone. My two biggest loves were running in the fresh air and doing classes at the gym. I loved the sociability of it, ironically now what I hide from.
So, alas, my fitness has dropped over the past almost three years and I have gained some weight. But one thing I am proud of its that I have kept a reasonable level of fitness. My dad was taking me to the gym, but now he is ill that has stopped and I’ve not been for three months. But at home I do what I call My ‘kitchen workouts ‘ whereby I hijack my parents kitchen for 45 minutes and sweat my pants off. Not terribly hygienic but it’s the only adequate space here. I don’t get the same enjoyment I used to, I have to force my lifeless body into that kitchen. But once I’m in full swing it’s not so bad and afterwards I have a rare sense of achievement.
The other thing I have thrown myself into since dad got ill is cooking and baking for my parents. I find it helps to be busy and doing something for them, and I’m quite enjoying coming and trying new recipes. Tonight I made seafood Paella and a butternut Squash Pie for tomorrow’s dinner. Dad has his first chemo session late tomorrow afternoon so we won’t get home from hospital until the evening and I doubt I’ll feel like cooking when I get home.
I’m so scared to let them put that poison into him, but of course I know he has to have the treatment. I hope and pray that the side effects won’t be too awful for him. I hope it will all be worth it, I hope he will be ok.